Comments on: Eating My Words

By: Righteously Insane™

Righteously Insane™ — Mon, 04 Jun 2007 05:35:28 +0000

Also, ask yourself if any of this is actually helping you grow as an individual. Oh I had a lot of those female targets back in college where I constantly ask myself, could she be the one? And then when one of them reciprocates more than the others, I focus on that particular female and the rest of the world is shut out. At hindsight, I realized that I’ve been emotionally stagnant all that time simply because all my attention has been on making sure that person is happy if I’m not really the reason why she’s smiling and started forgetting about myself.

Yeah, there’s all that gripe and shite about true love never demands anything in return and whatnot. But believe me when I say true love is reciprocated by true love even in the simplest of gestures. If you’re not getting any, just walk on by. At least you’re moving forward.

By: Sir Martin

Sir Martin — Sun, 03 Jun 2007 13:20:57 +0000

Then if you can convince yourself that you've done the best you can, you can try moving on. Perhaps there is someone more deserving of your effort. Unless of course you feel that there is still something you can do. But then I'd ask you the same question I asked my friend. Do we continue to stay now that the party is over? I can see that you feel the impetus to move on. Perhaps that is the next thing to do. Your call. But it won't be easy either. We can talk more about this soon, but as a practical tip, it all starts with realizing that there are other things deserving of your effort and acknowledging that these pay off for you. And knowing how spiritual you are, I am sure you won't have a difficult time realizing what it is.

By: J. R. R. Flores

J. R. R. Flores — Sun, 03 Jun 2007 08:58:57 +0000

Thanks, Martin. That’s the thing–everything I try is simply met with monosyllabic answers. I don’t really get much. I’ve given flowers a couple of times, invited her for movies, had lunch with her once (she was with all her girlfriends and I was just um, there). It all just kinda disappears off the face of the earth.

By: Sir Martin

Sir Martin — Sun, 03 Jun 2007 08:42:05 +0000

Let me tell you a story.

Two college friends and I once attended a party in our org. One of my friends had a huge crush on a fellow member and throughout the entire night, we coaxed him to just strike up a conversation with her. Hopefully, he would even end up asking her out.

The hours went on and still no progress. When it was almost time to call it a night, we asked our friend whether he would finally make his move. He asked us, “Can we stay a little longer?” It turned out that some people were staying on until morning and she was one of them.

I flatly told him, “If the next hour will be just like the past four hours, I think we better go. What difference will another second make if you’ll end up spending it like the last minute?”

We left early. Our friend ended up never speaking another word to her, but deep inside we knew he was just waiting for another chance. But it never happened. And as he learned harshly, the only guarantee life has is that someday he will lose the chance. Months later, the girl ended up with someone else.

Joey, all I can say is that there is no worse feeling in the world than knowing that things could have turned out differently if we just tried. And if they don’t, at least you can find comfort that you did everything you could.

I have been where you are — feeling that history and the universe all conspire to bring two people together — but trust me, it still takes one moment, one action to make it all happen. Perhaps you’re afraid that you’ll just screw it up but trust me, you could do worse — you could do nothing!

My friend, we have your back. Do what you feel you must and we’ll be there for whatever happens next. It’s not going to be easy but heck, when is it ever?