Silly Pickup Lines

Okay, I apologize for the slow traffic. My brain has been on the verge of short-circuiting and I’m being buried under an avalanche of papers to check at work. Matters of the heart are being mean to me, so I might as well make fun of them.

Here are some really silly pickup lines.

<Guy>: I wish I could be your hair…
<Girl>: ???
<Guy:> …so that I’d always be on your mind.
(Made by my brother)

Guy: Are you the cleaning lady?
Girl: What?!
Guy: …because I’m a mess without you.

Guy: Do you like mayonnaise? (or peanut butter)
Girl: Uh…yeah…
Guy: ‘Coz I’m Ladies’ Choice!

Guy: Do you have a band aid?
girl: Why?
Guy: Cause I scraped my knee…falling for you.

Lastly…

Guy: Did you feel that?!
Girl: Feel what?!?!
Guy: I felt something!
Girl: ?!?!
Guy: Oh sorry, it’s just me…
Guy: …you just rocked my world.

Yay, groanfest.

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~ by J. R. R. Flores on July 19, 2007.

25 Responses to “Silly Pickup Lines”

  1. i’d slap the person who would dare say that to me. :p

    they’re really stupid. rawr.

    maaarz signing out.

  2. You missed so many, sir!

    Guy: Do you have a map?
    Girl: No…?
    Guy: Because I’m lost in your eyes.
    ~
    Guy: Is there something wrong with your back? I’m pretty sure angels are supposed to have wings.
    ~
    Guy: Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa just what I want this year?
    ~
    Guy: Are you Jamaican?
    Girl: …
    Guy: ‘Cause you’re ja-making me crazy!

    Okay, that one’s stupid.

    Guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.
    ~
    Guy: Is your father a terrorist? ‘Cause you’re the bomb!

    That one’s really terrible.

    *groans* My goodness, why do I know so many?

  3. Forgot one:

    Guy: Hey, watch out! The police have a warrant for your arrest!
    Girl: What?!? Why?!?!
    Guy: ‘Cause you stole my heart…

  4. More:

    “My insurance premiums keep going up because I keep falling for you.”

    “If you were a laser you’d be set to “stunning.””

    Again c/o my brother.

  5. wow, your bro’s good at that, sir. have any idea why? XD

  6. sir!

    “Are you tired? You’ve been running through my mind all day. XD”
    “I can’t breathe! You took my breath away -_-“

  7. Gian> LOL

    Joe> Well, my brother’s pretty creative.

  8. uh.. wow sir. wouldnโ€™t expect to read those here. then again.. *laughs*

    guy: are you a jacket?
    girl: why?
    guy: because you keep me warm.

    guy: are you hurt?
    girl: why?
    guy: you must have fallen from heaven.

    guy: you must like computers.
    girl: why?
    guy: coz you turn me on.

    btw, sir.. love’s a composite number.. you know why?

    it’s got many factors. XD

    yeah. pilit. *rofl*

  9. I really think someone should make a massive master list of these. ๐Ÿ˜€ Thanks RC. (I don’t think saying someone fell from heaven is very flattering, though.)

  10. what if we do something like this for inkwell?!? *snickers*

  11. Hahaha. Those remind me of Paul’s pick-up lines last year. :))

    Agh. My brain’s turning into mush. >.<

  12. Jejo> That would be an excellent Inkwall activity. The guys need to come up with pickup lines while girls need to come up with the cruelest slams. ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€

    Joel> In fact, those that Andie posted are from Paul.

  13. *iq points dropping…* it’s all sir’s fault XD joke sir.

  14. Sir, I think you would do well to stay behind on Thursday and have a chat with Jejo’s gay lover (who is also my teacher in the Proogies progam). D:

    Apparently, his chinese class is also a wonderful pick-up line class. I nearly hit him once because of them. >:D

  15. jejo has a gay lover? I knew it. >_<

  16. YES! He does!

  17. But I thought Jejo was the gay one…? =)) Peace, Jejo XD

    Oooh. Inkwell activity. Whenwhenwhen? 8D

  18. okay, this one’s kinda gross ๐Ÿ˜›

    guy: if u were a booger, i’d pick you up first!

  19. to awtz.. that was nasty.. but makes sense..

    *twitches* *laughs*

    ooo.. when should we commence this activity ๐Ÿ˜€

  20. kelsy possesses the evil power of changing topics!!! nooooo…

    anyway, awtz, that’s really cool. but groast. XDDD

  21. i love this post. :)) i think i’ll be saying some of these lines to my guy friends. feeling ko, they’ll punch me or something. XD

  22. Hehe, glad you liked it. XD

  23. you must have fallen from heaven , cause that explains how you messed up your face.!

  24. We should grab coffee b/c I like you a latte.

  25. “excuse me miss, i think i lost my number…mind if i borrow yours?”

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