Silly Pickup Lines

Okay, I apologize for the slow traffic. My brain has been on the verge of short-circuiting and I’m being buried under an avalanche of papers to check at work. Matters of the heart are being mean to me, so I might as well make fun of them.

Here are some really silly pickup lines.

<Guy>: I wish I could be your hair…
<Girl>: ???
<Guy:> …so that I’d always be on your mind.
(Made by my brother)

Guy: Are you the cleaning lady?
Girl: What?!
Guy: …because I’m a mess without you.

Guy: Do you like mayonnaise? (or peanut butter)
Girl: Uh…yeah…
Guy: ‘Coz I’m Ladies’ Choice!

Guy: Do you have a band aid?
girl: Why?
Guy: Cause I scraped my knee…falling for you.


Guy: Did you feel that?!
Girl: Feel what?!?!
Guy: I felt something!
Girl: ?!?!
Guy: Oh sorry, it’s just me…
Guy: …you just rocked my world.

Yay, groanfest.


~ by J. R. R. Flores on July 19, 2007.

25 Responses to “Silly Pickup Lines”

  1. i’d slap the person who would dare say that to me. :p

    they’re really stupid. rawr.

    maaarz signing out.

  2. You missed so many, sir!

    Guy: Do you have a map?
    Girl: No…?
    Guy: Because I’m lost in your eyes.
    Guy: Is there something wrong with your back? I’m pretty sure angels are supposed to have wings.
    Guy: Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa just what I want this year?
    Guy: Are you Jamaican?
    Girl: …
    Guy: ‘Cause you’re ja-making me crazy!

    Okay, that one’s stupid.

    Guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.
    Guy: Is your father a terrorist? ‘Cause you’re the bomb!

    That one’s really terrible.

    *groans* My goodness, why do I know so many?

  3. Forgot one:

    Guy: Hey, watch out! The police have a warrant for your arrest!
    Girl: What?!? Why?!?!
    Guy: ‘Cause you stole my heart…

  4. More:

    “My insurance premiums keep going up because I keep falling for you.”

    “If you were a laser you’d be set to “stunning.””

    Again c/o my brother.

  5. wow, your bro’s good at that, sir. have any idea why? πŸ˜„

  6. sir!

    “Are you tired? You’ve been running through my mind all day. XD”
    “I can’t breathe! You took my breath away -_-“

  7. Gian> LOL

    Joe> Well, my brother’s pretty creative.

  8. uh.. wow sir. wouldn’t expect to read those here. then again.. *laughs*

    guy: are you a jacket?
    girl: why?
    guy: because you keep me warm.

    guy: are you hurt?
    girl: why?
    guy: you must have fallen from heaven.

    guy: you must like computers.
    girl: why?
    guy: coz you turn me on.

    btw, sir.. love’s a composite number.. you know why?

    it’s got many factors. πŸ˜„

    yeah. pilit. *rofl*

  9. I really think someone should make a massive master list of these. πŸ˜€ Thanks RC. (I don’t think saying someone fell from heaven is very flattering, though.)

  10. what if we do something like this for inkwell?!? *snickers*

  11. Hahaha. Those remind me of Paul’s pick-up lines last year. :))

    Agh. My brain’s turning into mush. >.<

  12. Jejo> That would be an excellent Inkwall activity. The guys need to come up with pickup lines while girls need to come up with the cruelest slams. πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

    Joel> In fact, those that Andie posted are from Paul.

  13. *iq points dropping…* it’s all sir’s fault πŸ˜„ joke sir.

  14. Sir, I think you would do well to stay behind on Thursday and have a chat with Jejo’s gay lover (who is also my teacher in the Proogies progam). D:

    Apparently, his chinese class is also a wonderful pick-up line class. I nearly hit him once because of them. >:D

  15. jejo has a gay lover? I knew it. >_<

  16. YES! He does!

  17. But I thought Jejo was the gay one…? =)) Peace, Jejo πŸ˜„

    Oooh. Inkwell activity. Whenwhenwhen? 8D

  18. okay, this one’s kinda gross πŸ˜›

    guy: if u were a booger, i’d pick you up first!

  19. to awtz.. that was nasty.. but makes sense..

    *twitches* *laughs*

    ooo.. when should we commence this activity πŸ˜€

  20. kelsy possesses the evil power of changing topics!!! nooooo…

    anyway, awtz, that’s really cool. but groast. XDDD

  21. i love this post. :)) i think i’ll be saying some of these lines to my guy friends. feeling ko, they’ll punch me or something. πŸ˜„

  22. Hehe, glad you liked it. πŸ˜„

  23. you must have fallen from heaven , cause that explains how you messed up your face.!

  24. We should grab coffee b/c I like you a latte.

  25. “excuse me miss, i think i lost my number…mind if i borrow yours?”

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